Body Positivity

Hello readers!  I apologize for my absence.  School is kicking my butt and frankly, I’ve been exhausted.  Anyway, today I want to talk about something that is slightly difficult for me to say.  In today’s society, there is a lot of pressure on girls, especially, to look a certain way.  As you may have figured, I do not look like every other girl; I have droopy eyelids, an open mouth, and a long face.  However, this is not what I want to talk about.  I want to talk about the body, and how I, and many girls out there, feel about themselves and their bodies.  Body image wasn’t really on my mind until I was maybe a sophomore or junior in high school.  I was never one to obsess over how my clothes fit me or how I looked.  I obviously wanted to take care of myself and be healthy, but I didn’t really analyze myself in the mirror all that much.  I noticed a change in how I felt about my body when I was recovering from my bowel obstruction in January of 2017.  When I was sick, I lost a ton of weight and did not look like myself, nor did I feel like myself.  Once I was healed and beginning to eat again, I noticed how my body was changing; how I needed to wear a size six instead of a size four that I needed when I was ill. Then it was how when I would sit down, my belly would be squished at the top of my jeans.  I never once thought of myself as overweight, and I still don’t, but something inside me flutters when I put jeans or leggings on in the morning, and it’s not the good kind of flutters.  When shopping, I notice how beautiful and thin the models are and how I look nothing like them.  People told me that no one should look like those models because they are almost always photoshopped and that being that thin is unhealthy.  Those words didn’t stop me from comparing myself to them though.

I watch the show Riverdale based on the Archie Comics and the actress that plays Betty Cooper, Lili Reinhart, spoke out about her issues with body image and how although she is still struggling, she is learning to love herself.  I am not the type of person to fawn over stars, but just having someone as beautiful and human as her speak up about something I struggle with helps.

When I was shopping at Aerie online one day, I noticed their models looked different than other stores.  It was because they started a Real Me campaign and have untouched models.  Untouched models mean that they are not photoshopped or made to look any different than they do.  It promotes body positivity and helps girls be confident in who they are.  Some of their models include a girl with an ostomy (which is what I had when I was very sick), a girl with tattoos all over her body, one with no hair, some that are not a size zero, and many more.  They are real people.  In the pictures, they are smiling so brightly and are unapologetically themselves.  The world needs more stores and people like Aerie to wash out all the negativity surrounding women’s bodies.

So with that, here is my confession to you all: I struggle with the way I look.  I sometimes will go through my closet and try to find something that doesn’t make me feel gross or bad about myself.  I am also learning to be okay with who I am and how I look.  I can’t change everything, but I can change the way I think and that’s what I’m trying to do: change the way I look at myself in the mirror.  This is hard to talk about, not because I’m ashamed because I am not, but because this is personal and I’m still trying to figure it all out.

I want everyone to know that I love you all for exactly who you are.  Don’t change just because society says to. So, be you because everyone else is already taken.  Shine on my loves.